Author: T.L. Smith
Sign on the dotted line…
I, Carla Star, agree to marry you, Corton Whiskey, on the date supplied in the attached contract. In signing this document, I agree that I shall not, by any means, try to break this contract. I understand that if I do, the envelope held in escrow will be released to the parties identified within the contract, and I shall forfeit my right to the privacy currently afforded to me by the aforementioned Mr. Corton Whiskey.
Lawyer acting on behalf of Mr. Whiskey
I received this contract, hand-delivered, and I’m now staring at it in disbelief. Me, the daughter of a senator, is being bribed by a one-night stand.
If he thinks he can blackmail me with his perversions, he can damn well think again.